Before I tell you my news, let me tell you a bit about myself as a writer. Especially since most of you know me because I just published my debut novel in August 2018.
My name is Brittney. I have been reading since I was 4 and writing since I was 8. For perspective, I turn 28 on the 24th.
My first project was Harry Potter fanfic. My parents divorced about a year before I discovered HP. Reading became my escape and it wasn't long before I discovered the series to escape my first major depressive episode.
I wrote fanfic within that world and was then completely hooked on writing. From there I wrote a historical Christian fiction followed by many YA/NA Paranormal books that were never finished or saw the light of day. Unless you were my friend Heather. She got to see a lot of my paranormal stuff and gave me so much encouragement and advice.
Flash forward to late 2017/early 2018 when I became a book blogger in the romance community. I read a lot within this genre and decided this was where I wanted to publish. I started blogging, making connections, and getting a feel for this community.
When I came up with Repercussions, it originally started in a very different place but with plotting and writing it took on an entirely different story.
Post Repercussions, I wanted to write Consequences next but another story took over. Most of you will know it as my next WIP, the story I already postponed once.
The Only Choice.
I lived and breathed this story. It took over everything and because I was so excited about it, I shared all the details.
Now here we are a week before original release and a month before new release.
My friends have seen me start to wane. I don't share as much, I don't talk about writing with the same enthusiasm that I used to. They knew before I even told them that my current WIP became a chore. A job that had a deadline and a date I must release on.
Yes, I did this to myself. I chose a date because I thrive under pressure and due dates. Even with my psychology professor telling my class that you should never put a creative person under pressure, I did it anyways to get this story done without procrastinating.
Here we are. So close to my birthday, release, and when this project should be done and in editing.
I say should be because it's not. I'm 70% done with the first draft and this book is nowhere where it should be. I love these characters but this draft doesn't do this story justice. My motivation and passion are gone, and I'm not the only one who has noticed even when I thought no one could tell.
I may not be new to writing, but I'm new to publishing. Realizing what works for me, for the stories I tell, is still a learning process.
What I'm learning? I am neither 100% a pantser or an outliner. One means my characters suffer and another means I give myself writer's block. I am a little bit of one and a lot of the other.
What am I saying exactly? Well, here it is.
The Only Choice won't be releasing. I'm not saying it won't ever, because I still love this story and these characters. But it won't be anytime soon. It has been back burnered until I can find the passion again to do it justice.
What I am learning about myself as an author, is that I have no chill but if I share too many details, I lose my passion, my voice, and my motivation.
Right now, I have another story that took over. Characters that I haven't told anyone about and a story that no one is aware of. Although it is difficult for me not to shout this story to the world, I think it is detrimental to me to write it before I share anything.
Y'all have expectations of me now. As an author and writer, and as a person. Sharing too many details increases those expectations even more, and I lose motivation and give myself a block.
One of the best things about being an indie author is growing and learning at your own pace. I'm doing just that with this current predicament I find myself in. I apologize to everyone who got excited for TOC, but again I say just because it's not releasing right now doesn't mean I won't release it ever. I need a break. A recharge. A new chapter that only I and a select few know about until it's ready for a sneak peek.
This is a learning process and I thank each and every one of you who follow me on this journey while I learn and grow from every mistake I make.
